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The Expendables 3

A cartoonish piece of brainless junk

Let me see if I’ve got this straight, Sylvester. Joining your own Rambo you’ve got Indiana Jones, the Terminator, Blade, Hercules, the Transporter, Zorro and Mad Max. And this cartoonish piece of brainless crap is the best you can come up with?

News flash, Sly: self-parody is only funny if it’s not the only thing you have left. Please. Retire. You’re not getting any prettier. At least stop trying to write screenplays.

Bright points: A show-stealing Antonio Banderas as a motormouth mercenary and Mel Gibson who, despite his despicable off-screen issues, makes for an enormously entertaining evildoer.

Japanese title: Expendables 3: World Mission. (126 min)