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Jurassic World: Dominion

How to make dinosaurs boring

Steven Spielberg’s 1993 Jurassic Park was, in the purest sense of the word, awesome. Most of us can remember the characters, the sci-fi technology, the story and the sheer slack-jawed delight of watching these gigantic reanimated beasts strut their stuff. The two “official” sequels and several spinoffs, meh, not so much. 

Then the franchise was revived in 2015 with Jurassic World, with considerably less awe but still plenty of big bad beasts. Dominion, the final entry in this “sequel trilogy” is a messy, crowded, disjointed, overplotted and soulless SFX extravaganza. The impressively inept Colin Trevorrow ain’t no Spielberg. Little tension, menace or humor. If you’re happy with an indulgent two and a half hours of ravenous dinosaurs going roar, this is for you. Also, you’re probably twelve.

The film’s sole good idea was to enlist Laura Dern, Sam Neill and Jeff Goldblum from the original trilogy. This trio serves to advance whatever story line there is so Bryce Dallas Howard and Chris Pratt can concentrate on running around and not being eaten. These humans do battle with the T-Rex, the Pterodactyl, the Velociraptor, and finally, in true lame sequel fashion, with the dreaded Bigasfukasaurus.

The franchise’s central moral lesson, “Perhaps just because you can bring something back to life, it doesn’t mean you should,” also ironically applies to the franchise itself. Time for this one to go extinct again. (147 min)