Alleged plot has the stork genus repurposed, for corporate profit reasons, from baby to parcel delivery, until one darling little big-eyed neonate brings it all back home, so to speak, with an obligatory message about family and belonging, etc. It’s thematically scattered, questionably motivated, heavy on the pop-culture gags, and so relentlessly paced it’s like it’s on fast-forward. Bottom line: a charmless, generic, too-cute babysitting movie full of movement, sound and color that’s aimed at distracting the kids for a while without giving parents too big a headache. No fun.

Japanese title: Kounotori Taisakusen. (87 min)