Originally published on metropolis.co.jp on November 2012

Alfie (Anthony Hopkins) leaves his wife Helena (Gemma Jones) for a slutty blond (Lucy Punch). Helena seeks advice from a loopy medium, much to the annoyance of their daughter Sally (Naomi Watts), whose husband Roy (Josh Brolin) is a one-book novelist with writers’ block who is attracted to the babe next door (Frieda Pinto) while Sally imagines life with her dishy boss (Antonio Banderas). They’re all just searching for happiness, or at least someone to validate their pointless lives. And then it just ends. Fitfully enjoyable, but it never gels. I don’t think Woody Allen had his angst-ridden heart in it.