Originally published on metropolis.co.jp on September 2012

This “reimagining” of the classic Grimm fairy tale may have fared better if it weren’t for the superior Snow White and the Huntsman, um, reimagining. Okay, that’s apples and oranges. Huntsman was a dark and suspenseful, not-for-little-kids thriller. This one plays it for laughs. It’s directed by Tarsem Singh, who made The Cell and The Fall (but also The Immortals) with costume design by the late Eiko Ishioka (working apparently with coffee filters). Julia Roberts, clearly having fun with the part, steps into the peasant-stomping boots of the evil queen. Lily Collins (spawn of Phil) does the Snow honors with innocence and spunk, and Armie Hammer plays the handsome prince as a doofus. Nathan Lane is funny-ish as the queen’s timorous accountant. The Seven Dwarves are not jolly miners, but thieves (and the most interesting characters in the movie). It’s not terrible; but it doesn’t live up to its sumptuous settings. The already weak storyline is unnecessarily convoluted and wanders overmuch, the dialogue is flat, the laughs it plays for are few, and while clever in spots (loved the queen’s beauty spa scene), it’s just not all that interesting. (106 min)