Originally published on metropolis.co.jp on August 2010

Train Creeps

Regarding “Varieties of Train Creeps” (The Last Word, August 13): Thank you Metropolis! Great idea this week! Every foreigner I know has grown tired of those infamous back page “editorials” with people who think they have a “unique” perspective on life in Japan. I could relate to every single one of those pictures. The “Leaners” are my favorite! I love to shift whenever the train hits a bump so I can let gravity take its course. Nothing like a good ol’ “manvalanche” to brighten your day. I’m guilty of being “The Unsteady Gamer” though. And boy do I hate those “Non-handicapped Sleepers.” They are fully aware of what they’re doing. Should have included a pic of the obaasan standing in front of someone in the regular seats while the handicapped seats are open though, just for balance. They’re not exactly innocent either. Those pics really hit the nail on the head. I hope to see this type of idea more often. Love The Negi stuff too!—superflycharismaguy2010

I love using the “Gaijin Avoider” to my advantage! Great way to have a double seat to myself on the bus or train. I love seeing a grumpy salaryman or an evil-looking housewife standing up, breaking their backs for an hour-long journey, just because they don’t want to sit next to me. Hilarious(ly racist)! As for the “Non-handicapped Sleeper,” if there is ever a pregnant woman standing up while those idiots pretend to be dozing, I give them a tap and tell them what’s what.—Charltzy

Unsolicited Missive of the Week

It is a crime how the yakuza have taken over hula presentation in Japan. It is a shame that all the Hawaiian words for hula, from alohahula.com, to manahula.com, and every hula combination, have been taken over by Japanese hula dancers. These little girls and old broads learn a little hula, call themselves kumu (“teacher”), [and] make $100,000 cheating stupid Japanese girls who pay to join these corrupt halau (“schools”) in Japan, when teachers have often never even been to Hawaii. Hula instruments and pahu skirts that are made in China—it is not right, not pono (“proper”). But it’s our fault for being so stupid and innocent.—Kahuna

A Cry in the Dark

Regarding “How To Train Your Dragon” (Movies, August 6): WTF??? All dubbed in Japanese??? They did that with Toy Story 3 too! Anyone know where I can see this in English? There’s gotta be at least one cinema. Please???—tecbarrera

Feeling Frosty

Regarding “Old School Fools” (The Last Word, July 30): Looks like this article touched a nerve. I certainly can’t agree with all the observations or remarks in the article, but I can tell you, as an employee of a US investment bank, it is highly likely that no one would care that you had highlights (though it depends a bit where in the bank you work; the sales team might perhaps frown on it a bit). There are Japanese guys with blond hair in the bank. Some of them are over 40 even.—chimpana

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