Originally published on metropolis.co.jp on July 2011

I read somewhere that poor judgment in investing is what’s forcing Nicolas Cage to appear in cheap hooey like this. Sad, but preferable to believing that it’s poor judgment in role selection. During the Crusades, Nic and Ron Perlman are tasked with delivering a young maybe-witch (a good Claire Foy) through a dark forest to her trial. The plot wanders considerably more than their arduous route, the predictable CG obstacles (including a last-act digital devil) are underwhelming, and I kept expecting the Knights who say “Ni!” to pop up. Cage is on autopilot and clearly not having any fun. Neither will you.