Originally published on metropolis.co.jp on October 2012

I never thought I’d be sitting through a vampire movie wishing I was watching Twilight instead. The name’s a misnomer. The main character is dull, yes, but not undead. He trolls the internet for young, suicidal women, euthanizes them and drains their blood, which he later drinks and throws up. Fun guy. This pretentious mess was directed (in English) by Japan’s Shunji Iwai, who also wrote, shot, edited and wrote the score, doing none of this particularly well. The tone is random. Several subplots remain unformed, notably a vicious murder/rape that has nothing to do with the rest of the movie. (120 min)